I’m fearless in motherhood, but I’m even more fearless being me.
I’ve been on a journey since becoming a mother, but It’s something I’ve realised and come to appreciate only recently. My journey is one of self discovery & being acceptive of who I am; And when I say ‘I’, I mean me, not me as Amelia’s mum. Me… Claire Mac.
Being a mother is part of me, it’s a big part of me, but it doesn’t define who I am, and I no longer feel guilty about it. I’m an advocate for empowerment in motherhood & am on a mission to provide others with the confidence to feel just as fearless being themselves as they do being a mother.
I haven’t always been fearless being me.
I’ve probably been the furthest away from fearless you could get.
If you asked any of my peers in school how they would describe me they’d either say ask ‘Claire who?’ and not remember who I was, or they’d say I was the quiet one. I hated being the quiet one, but it was a persona I was labelled with since primary school & a personality trait I was scared to steer from.
One of my earliest memories was winning an award in primary school, and having to walk to the front of the stage in front of the whole school. After thanking the head teacher for my award he bellowed in front of everyone ‘she talks’. And although it wasn’t the words that stuck with me, it’s the tone; The tone of shock, that someone like me could actually form words from my mouth and be a courteous human being.
I can still hear it now.
As I entered adulthood I was still very shy, but I could absolutely hold my own in my friendship group. I was one of those ‘quiet, until you really get to know me’ type people, and I was okay with this.
My confidence had definitely grown, however I still struggled in large groups of people, especially in regards to showing my opinions. I’d always let people with louder voices speak over me & never once confronted them. It put me in sticky situations a couple of times & looking back now I wish I’d have just spoken up.
But you live and you learn.
And I think this is where my confidence and level of fearlessness has come from. I’m embracing my flaws, understanding that there are things I’m not so great at, and I’m not letting them make me feel bad about myself anymore.
I’m giving self doubt the middle finger!
This year in particular I’ve learnt to be fearless being me.
Last year I gave so much of myself to motherhood, that my journey of self discovery & personal development took a back seat. If I’m being honest it more likely that it took a couple of steps back, rather than a back seat.
But isn’t that motherhood?
2020 Claire, although cooped up at home embracing lockdown knows herself and accepts herself more than ever… And that’s what makes me fearless.
I’m fearless wearing a slinky body con dress.
I’m fearlessly accepting of my post baby body.
I’m fearless going makeup free.
I’m fearlessly giving zero f*ks.
I’m fearless being underestimated.
I’m fearlessly sticking the middle finger up at self doubt.
I’m fearless admitting my flaws.
I’m fearlessly sassy in bubblegum pink loungewear.
I’m fearless in knowing exactly who I am.
I’m fearlessly saying no to diet culture.
I’m fearless showing parts of me deemed unacceptable.
I’m fearlessly living my best life.
I’m fearless in motherhood.
I’m fearless being me.
How fearless are you being you?