Every January I tell myself I’ll change and do things differently this year. And here I am, beginning of January and back to where I was last year.
The Blank Diary Fear. Santa has brought be my usual shiny new Moleskine diary for the upcoming year, after writing in family members birthdays and other must remember dates, it’s then just there. All those empty weekends ready to be filled with adventures and trips to far-flung lands.
I get to the second week of January after all the busy plans of Christmas and New Year, saying I’m going to give myself more me time this new year. Not burn the candle at both ends. But those white crisp diary pages are just staring at me. I get twitchy and a touch manic, going into full activity planning mode.
This leads to THE SPREADSHEET. I was planning so much in, I thought an overview of the year’s Friday, Saturday and Sunday dates would be a good idea so I could scope out empty spaces of time and when to squeeze in another visit to a friend or a full on day around London with a casual 6 hour coach travel time. Friends have laughed at the spreadsheets. My parents have joked that I’m visiting Berlin via Edinburgh back to Bristol in a 24 hr window. My argument is that I want to make the most out of my weekends and get out there doing things.
But do you know what is equally amazing? A duvet day. No alarms set to catch a 6 am coach. Reading for a two-hour stretch because you simply have nowhere else to go and enjoy it. Having time to potter and not dash around shops spilling your coffee over yourself.
I am currently single and do think a part of filling my weekends with trips and seeing friends is a part to do with not feeling lonely or that I’m missing out of weekends curled up on the sofa together, bingeing on Netflix. But really I like my crazy weekends, I might just need to be more kind to myself and use the Spreadsheet for good rather than evil and schedule in those blank diary days, more duvet days.
Do you get the Blank Diary Fear in January?